Comments on: Won’t Make Love With Me, She Won’t, He Won’t http://www.flowinglove.com/relationships/index.php/sexual-intimacy-love-making/513/wont-make-love/ Love Advice, Relationships Guide, Love Tips Sat, 21 Aug 2010 11:19:06 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 hourly 1 By: Lisa http://www.flowinglove.com/relationships/index.php/sexual-intimacy-love-making/513/wont-make-love/comment-page-1/#comment-2641 Lisa Tue, 08 Dec 2009 10:26:27 +0000 http://www.flowinglove.com/relationships/?p=513#comment-2641 My boyfriend and me, have been together for over two years. Alway's had sex. I had an abortion to him and later in the relationship, had a miscarriage. My boyfriend is living in a Christian based home for guys. He's been there for a while now. Suddenly out of the blue, he decides that we can make love anymore until we get married. I don't know what to make of it. When I ask him, he saids it a sin. But he does other sinful things, like lies. When he come over we lay in the bed and watch tv and he fools around, like kisses me puts his hands down my pants, I get all hot, he gets a hard on, and then just rolls over and starts watching tv like nothing happened. I am 19, he is 22, What do you make of this. This pushed me into an affair, I slepted with this other guy 3 times. I now want nothing to do with he, as I love me boyfriend. I feel so sad about this hole mess, and don't know what to do! Answer: We all make mistakes are in continuous growth patterns. At some level it sounds like he realized that God wants to bless you as a couple, but can't do that while your are living in that sin. It sounds like he is still allowing the temptation to overcome him, (even if you don't have intercourse, foreplay is still sin). Everybody sins, nobody is perfect, however we should strive to overcome our hormones and strive to do what is best in the eyes of God. The bible says in 1 Corinthians 7:9; But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. Now, this did not push you off into an affair, it was your choice to have an affair, nobody forced you, (You allowed your hormones, emotions, and your choices to control you). It sounds like niether of you can control yourselves, so don't allow yourself to be in a position, (or place), where you will lose your control, at least not until you are married. But, understand that a marriage foundation that is set on sex alone is going to have significant problems, because there are many other aspects of relationship than sex. I would highly suggest pre-marital counseling to you both. First learn what love is, because right now it's all about lust. My boyfriend and me, have been together for over two years. Alway’s had sex. I had an abortion to him and later in the relationship, had a miscarriage. My boyfriend is living in a Christian based home for guys. He’s been there for a while now. Suddenly out of the blue, he decides that we can make love anymore until we get married. I don’t know what to make of it. When I ask him, he saids it a sin. But he does other sinful things, like lies. When he come over we lay in the bed and watch tv and he fools around, like kisses me puts his hands down my pants, I get all hot, he gets a hard on, and then just rolls over and starts watching tv like nothing happened. I am 19, he is 22, What do you make of this. This pushed me into an affair, I slepted with this other guy 3 times. I now want nothing to do with he, as I love me boyfriend. I feel so sad about this hole mess, and don’t know what to do!

Answer: We all make mistakes are in continuous growth patterns. At some level it sounds like he realized that God wants to bless you as a couple, but can’t do that while your are living in that sin. It sounds like he is still allowing the temptation to overcome him, (even if you don’t have intercourse, foreplay is still sin). Everybody sins, nobody is perfect, however we should strive to overcome our hormones and strive to do what is best in the eyes of God. The bible says in 1 Corinthians 7:9; But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. Now, this did not push you off into an affair, it was your choice to have an affair, nobody forced you, (You allowed your hormones, emotions, and your choices to control you). It sounds like niether of you can control yourselves, so don’t allow yourself to be in a position, (or place), where you will lose your control, at least not until you are married. But, understand that a marriage foundation that is set on sex alone is going to have significant problems, because there are many other aspects of relationship than sex. I would highly suggest pre-marital counseling to you both. First learn what love is, because right now it’s all about lust.

]]> By: fateh Khan http://www.flowinglove.com/relationships/index.php/sexual-intimacy-love-making/513/wont-make-love/comment-page-1/#comment-2555 fateh Khan Mon, 19 Oct 2009 14:18:27 +0000 http://www.flowinglove.com/relationships/?p=513#comment-2555 a very satisfied married life till last few years. she is now 50 years and diabetic. she doesn't have any interest in sexual relations, and hate the same. Due to which I am having errectile Dysfunctional problems. But I like to have intimate sexual relations What to do? Answer: You do not have a dysfunction do to her, that's a scapegoat. First suggestion would be that you talk with her at a honest level, so much of relationship is about communication. Then perhaps you could both go see doctors to help you with the individual problems. But remember that as long as you are focusing on yourself, you are not in a otherness mindset. a very satisfied married life till last few years. she is now 50 years and diabetic. she doesn’t have any interest in sexual relations, and hate the same. Due to which I am having errectile Dysfunctional problems. But I like to have intimate sexual relations What to do?

Answer: You do not have a dysfunction do to her, that’s a scapegoat. First suggestion would be that you talk with her at a honest level, so much of relationship is about communication. Then perhaps you could both go see doctors to help you with the individual problems. But remember that as long as you are focusing on yourself, you are not in a otherness mindset.

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