Divorce rips apart and tears at our innermost being, divorce shreds bonds and leaves us with deep emotional cuts and wounds. Newly divorced couples experience sorrow, grief, and sadness of a marriage relationship gone astray. Divorce does happen, it is a difficult reality to cope with that leaves people feeling alone, betrayed, disconnected, undesirable, and unworthy. So where do you begin to pick up the pieces to your life after divorce? How do you move on and begin moving forward after divorce? There are many who offer well intended solutions and encouragement, but ultimately there is only one legitimate starting point for those who have been recently divorced.
"Put your heart right, reach out to God…then face the world again, firm and courageous. Then all your troubles will fade from your memory, like floods that are past and remembered no more, (Job 11:13-16). And when thou shalt seek there the Lord thy God, thou shalt find him: yet so, if thou seek him with all thy heart, and all the affliction of thy soul, (Deuteronomy 4:29 ). God will help you to heal the pains and hurts of divorce and he will help you to move on by way of forgiveness.
In order to move forward after divorce you need to focus on the future, you can not continually focus on the pain of the past and move on with life after divorce at the same time. Forgiveness is a process that will help you to make peace with your past. You need to be able to connect with safe people who you can talk to, people who are experiencing what you are going through, or have previously been divorced. People who will listen to you with compassion, understanding, and wisdom. Talking to others who are loving will help you to move on with a fresh start, and the talking alone will help to elevate up to fifty percent of the doubts, worries, and fears you may be now experiencing.
In a relationship based christian church you will find the love of God through his children. You will find support groups, (some specifically designed for those who have been divorced), where you can plug in, and where you will find that you are not alone. You will find people who care about you and who want to help you move forward from your divorce. Your divorce is not an ending, it’s a transitional point for love to become a habitual aspect of your life.
Your divorce has left you at the crossroads of life. Moving forward after divorce is a choice you make, God’s answer to loneliness is fellowship. In fellowship there is belonging, sharing, and the support of God’s family. Today is an opportunity to do something new and relationally refreshing. Your life after divorce is dependant on your choices, the hope is that you would choose a healthy loving solution. Besides, how well have the others ways been working for you?
Don’t worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. If you do this, you will experience God’s peace. Philippians 4:6-7
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